Wanted: Wine Tastemakers – Older White Men Need Not Apply?

Feb. 29, 2040

Dear Salem Morgon,

Thank you for your inquiry regarding the position we posted. We are currently screening the next level candidate for our wine tastemaker stint and you have made the cut. Congratulations!

As you know, we are currently recruiting candidates to form a dynamic new team for ViniVer§Ω as THE preeminent and never-before-seen #WineInfluencer Neoteric Eno-zine. The next step for us, with you, is to further ascertain if you will be a good fit, on our soon-to-be award-winning squad!

So, let’s get down to it, por qué no?

A Christmas Time Quiz for 2020 for the Italian Wine Trade

Chances are, you are already offline, having already sent out your generic holiday greetings, are not checking your email, and are ensconced somewhere in the mountains, by the seashore, with family, maybe on a beach in the Seychelles or Cuba, and settling in for a long and well-deserved holiday.

The harvest is in, the deed is done and what will be, will be. So, let’s have some fun with a short quiz.

The Scandal that has Shaken the Universe of the Masters of Ŝophisticated Ҫannabis

Dateline: April 20, 2049

It’s been nearly a year since 420 anxious Cannabis Sommeliers amassed at the Hotel Zig-Zag in Portland, Oregon. The purpose? To accept a challenge to pass the most rigorous testing to become one of a handful (now standing at 1937) of Masters of Ŝophisticated Ҫannabis (MŜҪ) in the world – fewer than have traveled to Mars.

The Top 10 Commandments of Italian Wine

With the holiday season fast approaching, and with hallowed respect for Italian wine, let’s take a moment and review the 10 Commandments of Italian Wine.

Out with the Old, in with Newton's Italian Wine DOCG +

from the "Pour Me a Little More Wine" desk

Giuseppe Martelli = DOCG                   Wayne Newton = DOCG +

It no longer appears to be a secret that there are 73 Italian wine DOCG’s. Everyone's discovered it. Walter Speller is writing about it for Jancis Robinson’s Purple pages. Giuseppe Martelli is proclaiming it within the pages of Gambero Rosso. Even bristly architechts in Southern Italy are laying claim to advancing the information. We’ve come a long way baby, from Wiki pages describing a scant 23 DOCG’s to various Italian government agencies reporting different numbers. Now the whole world knows. But what Walter Speller or Giuseppe Martelli or the occasional draftsman down South doesn’t know is that a whole new category of Italian wine DOCG has been born. Not in Italy but in the good old U.S. of A. That’s right, what Italy cannot do, America will. And who better to do it than Americans of distant Italian ancestry. So here it goes. You heard it here, first.

The statement:

In order to keep up with the demands of the marketplace and to insure the continued appreciation of Italian wine, we the people of distant Italian ancestry, have so proclaimed the creation of Italian Wine DOCG +. The criteria for the first group of Italian wines selected, the initial 10, are that they be:

1) From a traditional producing region.

2) That they utilize indigenous grape varieties that have been historically established in Italy.

3) That the use of popular blending grapes, such as Merlot, Cabernet or Syrah not be exploited to enhance the wine flavor and garner high scoring points from the dominant and influential international wine press.

4) That the use of oak be only for subtle purpose and not as a flavor substitute.

5) That the wines respect tradition but do not shun technology.

6) That the wines exhibit Italian character and delicious qualities.

Simply these wines offer a solid bulwark for the patrimony of Italian agriculture and viticulture to the world at large and represent all that is pure and good and fine about Italian wine.

This is not to limit these claims to these 10 wines solely. But initially that these wines are national treasures and should be so designated.

Interviewing Marty

If there is one person I could sit down and share a bottle of Italian wine with and talk to for an afternoon, Martin Scorsese has to be at the top of that list. I am an unabashed fan of his movies. When I get puny there are two things I want: home made chicken soup and a stack of Scorsese films, starting with Goodfellas. I love his energy, his passion and the way he has captured the American spirit and the Italian-American experience in his films. They are gritty, they are harsh and often they are crude. But they come from the streets. I have walked some of those streets; I feel his films in my bones.

So with a nice bottle or two of Sicilian wine, some Rapitala, a little Regaleali, maybe an Etna Rosso, if I could sit down and talk with Mr. Scorsese, I would love to. Until then, I must have a conversation with him by way of the dialogue (in italics) in films such as Mean Streets, Taxi Driver, Goodfellas, The Age of Innocence, The King of Comedy, Gangs of New York, The Departed, The Aviator and The Last Temptation of Christ. So, dear reader, no, this is not an actual interview, but one made up, as it is done in the blogosphere, exercising a little creativity and wasting a lot of time.

Adaptation

Was it a dream or did it really happen?

Outtakes from a storyboard imagining the direction a recent dinner might take in honor a member of a somewhat famous Italian winemaker family

The first course was a spinach salad, lightly dressed, and served family style. I am a shy person and know no one at the table save a few colleagues. Thankfully they were there. The winemaker was at another table. Really, really nice person.

Backing up first. I called the host and asked when the event would be over, as I wanted to stop by a friend’s restaurant and have a glass of wine with him. We talk food, he is on the cutting edge of Italian things in town, and I hadn’t seen him since December. The host said, wed be through about 9:30 tops. Great.

But they still lead me back...

...To the long and winding road.

In the real world, New Years day was almost a week ago. In the world of making numbers and getting everything taken care of, yesterday was the end of the year, December 37th.

This has been a long, long O-N-D. It started in August and finally ended, days into January. We are tired, but happy. Happy to see it over. But knowing it will start all over again. In fact I am packing my bags and will be on the move for the next few months.

Traffic Cone and Cannolo Porn - Starting the year end wrap-up

One traffic cone, two traffic cones ~ Traffic Cone Porn

I started going over 8,000 photographs from the year. After getting through January and February, I decided to procrastinate. Along the way I found these shots. Just a random offering of images that somehow seem to fit, albeit very loosely. I’m feeling a little risqué, in a laid-back on-the-couch kind-of-way. Anyway, just a little lagniappe. Enjoy.

Ya feel me DOGG?

from the "I tell the truth and I know what I’m talking about" department

In an amazing turnabout, the European Community has decided to immediately suspend the integration of Italian wine appellations into the PDO (Protected Designations of Origin) system. Last minute negotiations between the EU and Veneto President Luca Zaia have been reported and there appears to have been an 11th hour change. Reports have it that actor and record producer Cordozar Calvin Broadus, a.k.a. Snoop Dogg and President Zaia have formed a promotion company in the Veneto to realign Italian wines to fit a "more youthful and energetic" profile. The designation will immediately known as D.O.G.G. and the first designees, 13 of them, will receive the highly coveted denominations at a ceremony on Asolo on November 31, 2010.

Vinitaly Report: Italy’s Little (Social Network) Problem

From the "Will they ever get it?" department

Ok, I am going to go "all' Americano" on this one. I have been blogging my heart out for, oh, I don’t know, let’s say four years now. Seriously. The beat is Italy. Italian wine. I have gotten lucky and I have a good amount of people around the world coming to On the Wine Trail in Italy to read these posts. I am dialed into the industry, both in Italy and America. So what’s the deal with the knuckleheads who run things at Vinitaly? You know, the ones who put together seminars and decide topics, and such? At Vintialy those who make the decisions, decided it would be about time to finally put together a WINE AND SOCIAL NETWORKS seminar. So guys, why no love for the American bloggers?

Franco Ziliani got in touch with me early on and invited me and a slew of bloggers, Italian and American and from around the globe to his opening event in the Puglia pavilion on rosato wines. Someone knows that there are folks who write about Italian wine outside of the Italian culture and language. You now, the ones who help drive export sales and stimulate the Italian economy?
The internet is English centric, at least for the Western world. Hell, even the Chinese have figured out the “worldwide web” works better in English. I blog about Italian wine for four years now, have been a loyal Italian wine ambassador in America for 30 years. I’m an early adaptor, have figured out how to plug into Facebook, Twitter, Twitpic, Flickr, Friend Feed, Webshots. So who is in charge over at the press office at Vinitaly? Why did I find out about this event after it was all over? The internationally-inclusive nature of the seminar was, how do I say it, so very 19th century. Pirandello would be so proud of y'all.

Oh, niente signore. Farle vedere che se noi oltre la illusione non abbiamo altra realtà, è bene che anche lei diffidi della realtà sua, di questa che lei oggi respira e tocca in sé, perché – come quella di ieri – è destinata a scoprirlesi illusione domani.

I got on Twitter and asked around.

@ItalianWineGuy What's up with the knuckleheads who planned the #Vinitaly social media/blogging panel? What, don't American wine bloggers get invited?

These folks, Tweeted back:
@robbin_g and it was a complete snoozer!
@vinoiskeeno @italianwineguy it was ridiculous.
@WineOnTheRocks@italianwineguy Vinitaly and Organisation... not the best blend - uuuhhh, I mean - no comment!
Where was@tirebouchon?@ViniSMargherita?@brunellomaker?@mondosapore?@slgold ?

@Vinoalvino?


Yes, where was Franco Ziliani? If anyone is the Alder Yarrow, Eric Asimov, Steve Heimoff, Dr Vino and Tom Wark all rolled up into one uber-Italian blogger, it has got to be Franco Ziliani – why wasn’t he invited, involved?
Italian bloggers Filippo Ronco of TigullioVino, Vinix and Giampiero Nadali of Aristide Blog were there. Hell, they were presenters. I even got a Re-Tweet from Giampiero as I was writing this – he’s plugged in!

Note to folks who make the decisions at Vinitaly: thanks for including the good old USA. Crawl out from inside your 19th Century cave and wake up to the new global world order. It’s flat – it’s transparent – and you all are failing. Time for another Risorgimento, people.

Funny how Italy looks to America to buy their wines, in good years and bad, in years of crisis and scandal as well as in years of plenty. Many an Italian wine consultant is driving around Italy in Maseratis and Porsche Cayennes, courtesy of the money they have made selling wine to America. It’s equally mystifying that Italy, once again, is myopic when it comes to learning about how these things work. Once again, Italy falls back into their outdated cultural pecking order, a world in which only the Alto-Borghese have anything of value to say and the rest of us folks down below, the Terrones, are there to simply shut up and serve their masters.


Shame on all y’all. I give Vinitaly an “F” on their report card for the lame WINE AND SOCIAL NETWORKS seminar they held. As we say in good old America, “F ‘em Danno!”

written by Alfonso Cevola limited rights reserved On the Wine Trail in Italy

The Mark of Zaia

It has been one busy year for Luca Zaia’s Italy. From his power chair on the deck of the Italian Titanic, he has attempted to banish pineapples and kebabs, sell kiwi’s (who knew they were indigenous to Italy?) back to China from whence they came. He defended the Crucifix, Mozzarella di bufala and Sangiovese. He elevated Prosecco to the heights of Barolo and the once mighty Brunello. He was into everything, even collateralizing bank loans with wine. You name the cause and it seemed Luca Zaia was there to defend the proto-Italian position.

He finally, single-handedly, anointed Amarone, the darling red from his beloved Veneto. I am surprised he didn’t move the minister of agriculture offices to Padova, so he could be closer to his dearly loved Veneto. But it seems that will change soon. Luca Zaia is running for President. Not of the world, not of Italy. But president of the region of the Veneto. Does Luca Zaia have his sights set on a higher role in the destiny of Italy’s future in the 21st century?

And why, you ask, is this of interest to Italian wine lovers? Well, dear listeners, there are a myriad of reasons. Luca said this last summer, “Italian vineyards are under attack.” The political is always involved in the doings of food and wine in Italy. And politicians can be a help or a hindrance to those who toil in the fields. Luca Zaia has been an enormous advocate for his Veneto homeland.

But if he becomes president of the Veneto region (and there are those who say he is a shoo-in for the post) will his Lega Nord secessionist leanings unite the wine world? Or will things become even more fragmented? Will the Veneto morph into a San Marino or an East Timor? Will we find easier parking near the Fiera in Verona or hotels we can walk to from the endless pavilions? Dare we dream a dream so large?

Viewing the movie, Gomorra, I can understand why a productive, ambitious Italian from the North might want to put a little distance between him/herself and the tentacled dealings of the South. Both my grandparents walked away from the region, in fact, the country, 100 years ago. My kind can never go back. I got sick to my stomach looking at that film, even though one can point to a series like “The Wire” or even “Weeds” and ask why America would be the preferred zone for setting up a life. We all have our blinders. But this is about Luca Zaia, so we must get back on our high horse and contemplate the New Italy.

“Solo chi conosce bene la propria identità può costruire un ponte.” (Only he who knows their own identity can build a bridge.) -Luca Zaia

Will the new Italy banish tomatoes? They came from the New World. And chocolate? And potatoes? What about gnocchi? And corn? What will the polenta eaters do? How about Cabernet Sauvignon? Or Primitivo? Are they now indigenous, really? Or eggplant, brought to Sicily by the followers of Mohammed? Or rice, brought by traders through Venice from Asia? What will the Italians eat? Or drink?

Luca Zaia, you will have some explaining to do if you achieve your next ambition, which might be a stepping stone to your ultimate goal? What will you disassemble in the world of food and wine to advance your cause? And what is your cause, really? Are you some kind of Manchurian candidate from the Veneto and the Lega Nord, hell bent on taking apart this young unified country we know as Italy? Do you aim to be Savior? Or Sultan?

Is this good for Italy and the food and wine business? Is having a Prosecco Godfather such a bad thing? After all so many things from Italy have been stolen and now they come from other places, like Parmigiano, Prosecco and Pomodoro di Pachino. The nerve to take tomatoes from their ancestral home in Sicily to grow them in China? That would be like taking the Kiwi’s away from the Marche, an abomination.

From a younger country (albeit an older democracy) looking towards you from the shores of America, it appears you want to perform some kind of surgery to the body of Italy. Anyone who studies the culture and the language and the food of Italy, know that Italy is far from “unified”. But tread carefully, lest you take her back to a new renaissance of darkness in your desire to have your prowess magnified.

In reality there are places where things have their origins. Yes, tomatoes, potatoes, even pasta didn’t originate in Italy. But Italy did their best to make the experience of eating those foods something uniquely Italian. And yes I do not like to see wine producers ripping off the popularity of Prosecco by bringing it out from places like Australia. But what is the real motivation for Supernova Zaia? What is behind the mask?

“Let them eat Panettone.” might be the apothegm, as long as you freely pour Prosecco to your legions of admirers (soon to be sans polenta?). Will you wage a larger Holy War to make sure there will be no citron or rum in any of the cakes in the land? Denounce the infidel eggplant and the pagan potato to your legions of followers as you march from Pordenone to Predappio in search of a purer and nobler expression of Italianism? Search for a new name, as the word Italy has no root in the land, it is merely a word invented by the Greeks during their hostile takeover of the Southern lands, those same lands that some wish to someday break away from? Will you break clean and soon? And retire to your eagles nest in contemplation of a new order in which your vision will someday be a reality?

I will leave you dear listeners, and Zaia, with this last thought. If you truly want your destiny to rise up listen to the words of Don Alejandro, advising his son Don Diego on his future:

"Get life into you! I would you had half the courage and spirit this Señor Zorro, this highwayman, has! He has principles and he fights for them. He aids the helpless and avenges the oppressed. I salute him! I would rather have you, my son, in his place, running the risk of death or imprisonment, than to have you a lifeless dreamer of dreams that amount to nought!"

Give it a stab, Zaia - make your mark!

written by Alfonso Cevola limited rights reserved On the Wine Trail in Italy

Eight signs that your wine is going through midlife crisis

You bought a couple of cases of that special Barolo, Amarone or Brunello several years ago. Maybe it was some highly rated wine, or maybe it was something you found by chance encounter. Perhaps you grew up with the wine in your family, drinking it during holidays and special occasions. When you became independent and were on your own and started to settle down, perhaps you made the plunge and committed to a couple of cases or in any event an ample supply of the wine. You knew the wine and wanted to grow old with it. And then, something happened after 10 -15- 20 years. The old spark, that magic that attracted you to that wine was harder to find. That, my friends, was the beginning of eight signs that your wine is going through midlife crisis.

• Makes a dramatic change in style or appearance and is suddenly harder to get to open up.
All of a sudden you find pamphlets in the cellar about organic and biodynamic interventions. Catalogs arrive in the mail for preparations and there is a smell of incense in the wine cellar that you never smelled before.

• Displaying the classic signs of depression – dry cork, loss of fruit, imbalanced flavors.
Every time you take the cork out of the bottle it shatters. The wine is cloudy and won’t settle. The flavors are muddled and dissonant

• Has severe quality swings and is inconsistent every time you open up a bottle.
One in 4 or 5 times you bring the bottle out to open it is happy and merry the other times it is all over the place- corked - no fruit – Brett – Mercaptin.

• Expressively detached and restless with whatever glass or decanter presented in.
No Reidel, no Spiegelau, no Schott; No vessel seems to be the right fit.

• Has this empty feeling inside and seems to be uneven for no apparent reason.
In the middle the fruit has dried out and the wine sags, is excessively hot, and is overly alcoholic.

• Seems to only care about laying down in the dark and not being disturbed - distant and unresponsive.
Hard to find in the cellar, often misplaced or missing, like is has been moved or taken to another location. When found, it lies there stuck in the rack, not wanting to move or be moved.


• No longer seems satisfied with what food you're able to provide to match up with.
All the classic dishes that went with it no longer seem to match up – the old combinations no longer work. Family members seem as strangers.

• Seems the wine’s manner has changed - it still loves you, but it's "not in love with you."
Not that the wine can say it, but after all these years one can sense that something is wrong, something is over. No matter how hard you try to coax the wine out of the vessel, it comes unwillingly and with trepidation. The taste, the fruit, the flavor, screams “we’re over.”

written by Alfonso Cevola limited rights reserved On the Wine Trail in Italy

Eugenio - bon anima -Sept 7 2005

Vinitaly 2009:The Makeover

So many crazy things happened during Vinitaly this year that there is no place to turn to but sophomoric humor. I can’t change the way the Italians think about the current “crisi” but I can change the way they look. So to lighten things up a bit on these pages (something folks have been telling me I “need” to do lately) I thought I’d call on my Hollywood make-up artist friends (actually they are friends with Bea) and see what we could do to update the look of some famous Italian wine personalities that are instrumental for turning the ship around. After all, modern wines call for modern looks; that is the essence of bella figura, no?

Angelo Gaja was honored for his family and their 150 years worth of involvement in wine. Angelo, it’s time to go green and red and fly the Italian flag proudly on your face. The green glasses show vision for a greener future and the red rug shows you still have the fires burning bright.

Dino Illuminati and long time client Adelmo Banchetti, from Dallas, Texas, are always clowning around. These guys know how to have a good time. And while both of these gents have made huge strides in their wines and their food over the years, their “look” has gotten old. So if Adelmo and Dino aren’t going to Twitter and Text, they can be at least entertaining to the young folks who are. For the makeover, we have given Adelmo his fondest wish, to be the clown with the funny nose, the flaming red hair and a hickey. Kind of a mixed message, but Adelmo likes edgy. For Dino, we have gone a little mad professor with the hair and the beard, but with the cool edge that only Jackie-O Ray-Bans can transmit. So we have fun and edge and cool and now they’re ready to embrace further modernity and the future. Avanti ragazzi!

We’re going Western with the next two gents. Think Westworld. Riccardo Cotarella had done traded in his Porsche Cayenne for a Vintage American pickup. Along with that he is ordering a slew of American oak barrels to make the complete transition for one of his special wines from the Maremma. The man is a cowboy and a driver at heart and now the vision is complete. Bravo, Riccardo.

Piero Antinori is going a little more raffinato on us. Maybe it’s the time he has been spending with his Franciacorta project and the proximity to George Clooney’s lakeside manse. In any event, Piero is kicking back, enjoying his status as the Marshall of the Maremma. Nothing gets by Piero, nothing. He sees everything and knows where all the bodies are buried. He is a Superior Tuscan.

Romano dal Forno has been talking to his son. Time to spruce up the place. Done. Now, what to do about all those years that have passed, how to upgrade the look? How about a little bad boy rocker, a cross between liev Schreiber and Sammy Hagar. Red hair is all the rage in Italy for men these days, and Romano isn’t immune to the lure of the fiery red. Yes, he has capitulated to the pressure of fashion, but with that Jim Croce ‘stache, he makes for a dashing vision of the modern winemaker in the modern times.

And finally, this wouldn’t be complete without a chime in from dear old Luca Zaia, the dashing Minister of Agriculture. Some think we don’t like Luca on this blog, by au contraire, we love Luca. And he loves us. Keeping with the musical theme, our fashionistas have chosen to give Luca a modified Beatle look, in homage to Ringo, the underappreciated one. Instead of drumsticks we have given Luca farm implements in which he can drum home his message. Doesn’t he look fab? How do we get his autograph? He is saving Italy from pineapple and kebab and giving Prosecco its rightful place alongside Champagne as one of the greatest bubblies the world has even known. And he does it all by acting naturally. Auguri, Doctor Zaia.

There you have it. This was the best, the greatest, the most modern Vinitaly ever. I’m so glad we didn’t miss it.



Next year let's do it in Vegas. The Italian's would love it. Good times!

written by Alfonso Cevola limited rights reserved On the Wine Trail in Italy

American Squirrel Wine Blog Award Winners Announced

One of our favorite non-wine blogs, the Las Flores View Point Squirrel Colony, is proud to announce the winners of the first-ever American Squirrel Wine Blog Awards. It seems the Critter-Critic has taken it on himself to break from the pack and Award some very deserving blogs for their service to the community and the blogosphere in general. Seeing as it is the end of a very busy week and we have too much to do, we will ask that you focus your attention on the Los Flores Blog to read more about these most important Wine Blog Awards.


- Starsky and Hutch

Tags: American Squirrel Wine Blog Awards, American Wine Blog Awards,

The Trouble with Tribalism

What are the Italians thinking? Here we have this major sea change in America, along with a world economic crisis, and they start getting down on their friends and neighbors? We have seen some far-out Italian politicians in the last 30 years, but this Luca Zaia, what planet is he from? This is whom the Italian wine industry has to lead them in the 21st century, to boldly go?

In December, Dr. Zaia said,” We must launch the pineapple strike and of all those products that have nothing to do with the Italian agriculture. Yes, therefore, to zampone and cotechino. And no, instead, to the non seasonal products, that do not belong to our tradition and that, often, are cultivated in countries where it is still possible to use insecticides."

But it's OK to employ the wide use of pesticides in Italy, such as Cirtoxin, Decis, Tramat Combi and Lasso Micromix.

On Brunello, the Minister said back in July, with an announcement that the agriculture ministry's department of inspectors will certify the authenticity of the premier Italian wine, "With this act we have not only reinforced our system to guarantee the utmost protection of the consumer, but also restored the image of Brunello, which is a symbol of Italian excellence not only in the United States but the whole world.''

And then 96% of the Brunello producers voted in favor of continuing to use 100% pure Sangiovese grapes for the production of Brunello. After much hasty debate, of which there was much talk about allowing in other varieties.

I asked a producer friend, why the flip flop? Asking not to be identified, he replied, "What does it matter? They (the Brunello producers) are going to do whatever they want to do, like they always have. They feel like the scandal has passed and anyway, some feel entitled to produce a wine that will sell in the world market."

And a month later the Italians were banging the drums that they were the number one producer of wine in the world. For the world! The French had been defeated in the fields. So they felt emboldened. Even Dr. Zaia took time out from his anti-alcohol campaign to slurp some swill among the vines.

I don’t know what to make of his anti-pesticide/anti-alcohol/anti pineapple/ anti cauliflower posits. Zaia eschews kebab in favor of cotechino, cauliflower in favor of broccoli and pineapple in favor of kiwi. Huh?

This pineapple strike in December: Zaia said he was concerned about the environmental impact of shipping pineapples over long distances. But he has campaigned vigorously to sell Italian kiwi’s to China. Just one month ago the Beijing opened the doors wide for the Italian kiwi. Dr. Zaia took the podium, "After ten years of intense diplomatic and technical work from the Italian ministry of Agriculture, we obtained a great result for quality produces in our country. By opening the Chinese market to Italian kiwifruit, a range of new significant possibilities of development for the Italian fruit and vegetable sector is thus displayed."

America has a new president, elected by a large margin, some would say overwhelmingly. His childhood home is Hawaii, and Zaia is throwing down on the national fruit of our president’s homeland. Meanwhile kiwi - which is native to China – is being sent from Italy to China. Whose carbon footprints are all over that?

“What business do I have posting my editorial on Italian or even Lucchese “ethnic food” policies? None, aside from my knowledge that Italian cuisine became a universal gastronomic language thanks to its absorption and incorporation of foreign culinary traditions. Dried pasta? From the Arab world (yes, the Arab world). Tomatoes? From the New World. Corn for Zaia’s beloved polenta (I love polenta, too, btw)? From the New World. Stockfish (baccalà)? From Norway.”

“No polenta e baccalà? I can’t imagine a world without it nor do I know of another country where these two foodstuffs could be brought together so deliciously!”

And if we are going to toe the line in Italy, what about coffee? I don’t imagine Dr. Zaia driving a Fiat or even a Lancia. My guess would be a BMW. But, hey, they don’t grow coffee in Italy and they don’t make BMW’s in Italy either, so it’s OK. It's also OK to use (non-local) Mid-East oil to run the car. And (non-local) Russian natural gas to heat the corner office.

Or they could all go back to riding horses in Italy, like we all do in Texas. Then Dr. Zaia could show off his horse-whispering mind-meld talents. Another 60 million horses in Italy wouldn’t have too serious an impact on global warming. It’s only 60 million methane producing mini-factories. Maybe they could feed espresso beans to the horses and the Italians could harvest them after they passed through the horses digestive systems, like the civets in Indonesia. Then it could be considered truly Italian.

Why am I so angry? It’s because I see politicians not understanding the way the world is going and not wanting to lose their power - their gravy train - so they work to keep people down by fear and ignorance. Don’t buy pineapples because they are not local, but let’s sell a non-indigenous kiwi to a country where the kiwi originated from, which just happens to be halfway across the globe. Then the rest of us have to clean up the politician's messes.

I recall what I once heard Bucky Fuller say. He said, “You take a spaceship and load up all the politicians and take them on a round trip around the sun, no one back on earth skips a beat. You take that same spaceship and take all the farmers on that same trip and guess what, we all starve in 6 months!”

Next thing he’ll be wanting to ban chocolate.


Beam him up, Scotty.

written by Alfonso Cevola limited rights reserved On the Wine Trail in Italy

Casual Fridays Redux: Nomadic Furniture for the Jug Wine Lover

My friend Hank Rossi and his wife Phillissa just returned from a two month nomadic trip across Europe, their blog is a hoot, go give it a look-see. To ease them back into the New America, I am offering them post-economic meltdown re-design suggestions for their flat. Unless they got out of the market before they left, they might not be traveling as much. Knowing Hank, they probably have all their money intact, which would be OK with me, seeing as they are great folks. And when they are gone we sneak in their place (the doorman loves Pinot Grigio) and have wild parties in their place. I also drive their Jaguar convertible around town, acting like I'm in a higher income bracket that I really am. All in good fun. So to welcome Hank and Phil back I am bringing back an old post I did a couple of years ago. Since then there are more new furniture projects. Have at it Hank, Rossi wine in jugs is the new paradigm for the economic times; sales of Carlo Rossi are off the charts!

Years ago I had a sculpture teacher in Silicon Valley whose father-in-law was Carlo Rossi. We used to go up to the prof’s house in San Francisco because his wife cooked for us (and she was real pretty), and we always had an endless supply of wine. It was cool.

Now all those empty jugs of Carlo Rossi wine can have a new life. Artist Jay Blazek of Seattle has created 6 do-it-yourself projects.

Go to CarloRossi.com and see for yourself. Videos outline how to make in a simple and entertaining manner.

The Cabernet Couch, just the spot to do some vertical (or horizontal) tastings

written by Alfonso Cevola limited rights reserved On the Wine Trail in Italy